Feedback Without Fear
As the SHRA performance management cycle winds down, it’s the perfect opportunity to revisit how we think about feedback. It is so much more than a once‑a‑year performance management event. When done well, it can be an ongoing conversation that strengthens both individuals and teams. Used effectively, feedback aligns expectations, corrects issues as they arise and fosters the professional growth necessary to fulfill our university’s mission.
Feedback is said to be a gift, but for many, just hearing the words performance review can send stress levels skyrocketing. Feedback is still seen as a ritual rather than an everyday tool for growth.
That’s why we asked the experts in University Human Resources to help demystify feedback and show us how to move from fearing it to embracing it.
Why Feedback Matters
Some things are better left unsaid, but that’s rarely true when it comes to professional feedback. “The cost of silence is blindsiding people,” Senior Employee Relations Consultant Kathy Woodford said.
When managers avoid timely conversations, staff are left guessing. “Employees don’t know what they don’t know,” Woodford explained. “Without feedback, they may think they’re doing well while a manager’s frustration grows in the background.”
However, critique is only half the equation. “Managers sometimes forget to bring authentic positive feedback into the discussion and focus only on what needs to be fixed,” Woodford noted. Providing this full-circle feedback is essential for boosting retention and engagement.
Frameworks That Keep Feedback Conversations Objective
To reduce anxiety, Stephanie Davis, assistant director of Learning and Organizational Development, recommends structured models that ground feedback in fact rather than emotion.
- SBI – Situation, Behavior, Impact: Developed by the Center for Creative Leadership, SBI is a simple, objective technique that reduces defensiveness by focusing on specific actions, allowing recipients to clearly see how to improve performance or change behavior. “You’re focusing on the situation, the behavior you observed and the impact it had,” Davis said. “The more specific you can be, the better.”
- SBIDB – Situation, Behavior, Impact, Desired Behavior, Benefits: An extension of SBI, this framework adds desired behavior (a clear request for what should happen in the future) and benefits (the positive result that will occur if the behavior changes) into the mix. “It gives employees full‑circle feedback,” Senior Employee Relations Consultant DaJanava Gore explained. “It’s not just reactive, it’s proactive.”
- COIN – Context, Observation, Impact, Next Steps: Developed by author and executive coach Anna Carroll, COIN structures conversations around specific facts and consequences to collaboratively agree on actionable future improvements. This structure is ideal for forward-looking coaching and collaboration.
Rather than endorsing any one framework, NC State shares options like SBI, SBIDB and COIN to help leaders navigate conversations with confidence. “There is not a one-size-fits-all solution,” Gore said. “It’s situational and individual.”
Creating a Culture Where Feedback Flows in All Directions
Leaders play an important role in fostering a culture where feedback flourishes, not just from manager to subordinate, but in all directions, including from subordinate to manager and peer-to-peer.
Upward feedback, which is constructive input that employees give their direct managers, can feel especially intimidating from the subordinate’s perspective. Woodford emphasized that leaders must make it feel safe. “Feedback is a two‑way conversation,” she said. “Managers have to be open to hearing things they may not expect or want to hear.”
Peer-to-peer feedback also thrives in a healthy culture. “There’s no magical way to do it,” Woodford noted. She says the same principles apply across the board: be respectful, be specific, be curious.
When leaders model vulnerability, they signal that growth is shared, not punitive.”
— Stephanie Davis, Assistant Director of Learning and Organizational Development
A Simple Step To Start
So, what one thing can a leader do today to promote healthy feedback in the workplace? Davis offered a practical challenge. “Ask for feedback,” she said. “When leaders model vulnerability, they signal that growth is shared, not punitive.”
Feedback isn’t a performance event. It’s a relationship‑building practice, a goal-setting opportunity, one that strengthens individuals, teams and the entire organization.
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